Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Assignment #3-Poems

School Spirit

Summer-Freedom
My heart is struck by the bell.
No more play,work time is now.
Lesson one, unit two
think about the future!
Or you're gonna get screwed...
Test after test, better not fail.
Sports after school,
pressure's on now.
Do I look alright?
Apparently not, because you didn't
get a date to homecoming.
Which college are you going to?
If you don't, well, then you've failed.
Memorize vocab.
Study equations.
I just want to get in the car,
and drive away.
But I can't even leave the
North lot because it's so crammed.
waiting for the weekend,
then things will be alright.
The life of a highschooler,
man, this is not right.



Sleeping Under a Starry Sky

The stars paint the sky.

The sand below me is warm.

The smell of a campfire lingers on my sweatshirt.

The slight laughter of a friend resonates in the distance.

The once dark sky is illuminated by the sliver of a moon.

The solitude is wonderful.

The slumber is sweet.

The stars paint the sky.

2 comments:

zoe said...

1. My first impression of "School Spirit" was a kid standing with an endless for spiraling around their head.

2. "pressure's on now.
Do I look alright?
Apparently not, because you didn't
get a date to homecoming."

3. The phrasing works well because what is going on in the piece is so hectic.

1. My first impression of "Sleeping Under a Starry Sky" is a calm cool night in the Boundary Waters in summer.

2. "The smell of a campfire lingers on my sweatshirt."

3. Maybe take out all the "the's" so the "ssss" sound resonates more.

4. The second poem appeals to me most because I am so attached to the Boundary Waters. It reminds me of camp, the place I love to be most.

Carol Weeps said...

I like the second one a lot. Some questions...what does the campfire smell like? What does the air sound like? I'd work in a few more details.